Making My Soul Sing

Energy.

It’s a thing right? We all have it on a physical level – or not some days. We are energy. We vibrate. On a cellular level we vibrate. Everything living thing vibrates. That is energy. Vibrating takes energy & creates energy. Mother earth vibrates. Literally. Have you heard of the Schuman Resonance? (have I spelt it right?) It blows my mind.

This may be abit too woo for some people & that is fine.

I don’t know the moment I became aware of this stuff, there wasn’t like a huge bang (although it’s actually possible that there was in my brain), no huge epiphany. It just started seeping into my life. Into my sphere of awareness. But slowly I have started to learn about, feel into it, acknowledge it & work with it.

I remember a few years ago, stood in my garden grounding barefoot on the grass, prepping for a case study treatment for my crystal therapy course (it’s still not finished but that’s another story) & my cat Merlin came out, he reacted so strongly to the energy I was calling in he jumped up & scratched my legs. He was furious.

Some people might say he was an angry cat ( he was), but I came to realise that he was very sensitive, and that day the energy was too much for him. I could never give him reiki, or massage him with crystals – it was too much for him. Whenever I was doing treatments he used to make himself scarce.

I guess talking about feeling things goes hand in hand with working with your intuition right? You can physically feel the feelings, but its your intuition that then guides you. That’s how I interpret it at least. It’s taken me a long time to learn to sit with feelings – like really it with them, all of them. The good the bad & the ugly. Go inside & ask what am I feeling? What is this telling me? Is what I am feeling real? Am I absorbing stuff from other people? From my surroundings?

Ok, so I’m going to say it. I have realised that I am an empathic person. For me, that also encompasses being a highly sensitive person.

Yes, its a thing.

By the way, I don’t think that any of this makes me a special person at all. I truly believe we are all empathic, all sensitive, but through our life experiences & our nuturing we can lose this, we no longer recognise or use it. Imagine that through the generations of our ancestry these skills, these feelings, this knowledge has been ignored & buried. But it remains there, buried deep within our DNA.

Working with, talking to other humans who have this same awareness has been pivotal for me. Having a safe space where I can voice all my stuff is essential. Because sometimes out in the world when you say to people “it doesn’t feel right for me” gets the piss taken out of you. But, I have learnt to listen to those feelings & over time to acknowledge them & be guided by them.

Hand in hand with this is working with my energy centre’s. My chakras.

Again, I know for some they will be rolling their eyes. But this stuff is not new age. It has been written about for centuries in a variety of ancient texts. Go look for yourself. Don’t take for granted what your told.

I have to work hard to protect my energy. My space. You can give too much sometimes and some people also take too much. That is when it can manifest in physical, emotional & mental ill-health. Dis-ease.

That is part of what keeps happening to me. Then I crash. I freeze. Over time, this has been occuring with more regularity. Initially (2001 ish) I was diagnosed with depression. Over time, depression & anxiety. This moved aside to become stress. They have all manifested in pretty much the same way. It started happening maybe every 4 or 5 years, but for the past 3 years it has been an annual occurrence. Over those 23 ish years I have changed as a human. I am no longer the Donna I was. I am edging towards living in true alignment with my soul. I have shed many layers. I have grown. I have far less fucks to give.

There’s something else I wanted to mention & I have forgotten. Bollocks. Brain fog is a beautiful thing eh?

Oh yeh, I know. I am learning more about neurodiversity. I am waiting for an autism assessment. I know I sit somewhere between autism & adhd. Why do I need an assessment? Because I want to understand myself better, and also because there is a whole host of support out there. But for now, I am in limbo. Still struggling – at times – to exist in a world where I am no longer trying to fit in, but still have to work & function in.

Its an interesting balancing act.

I’m not sure if any of this makes sense? Or if it flows. I don’t possess much eloquence when it comes or verbalising (or typing) my thoughts, but hey ho.

I want to talk more, but I think that may be enough for now.

I want to talk about sound & how this interacts with & affects our energy through vibration.

But for now I’m off as I’m too cold sat still in the kitchen.

Sending love out into the world